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About Varied / Hobbyist Premium Member Liz AnneFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 7 Years
13 Month Premium Membership
Statistics 289 Deviations 1,174 Comments 5,136 Pageviews

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The crazy mash up of my taste in cute, funny, beautiful, moving, awesome and hot!

Stamp Collection

The Cool Kids by TheDeathOfSenLunatics Not-So-Anonymous by KyllianLove is love. by Chaotic-Whispers
Books/Authors I read and re-read
Good Omens Stamp by SerainHunger Games Stamp by Terra575Douglas Adams Stamp by mrTwisby
Things I will never grow out of
Stamp Merida (Brave) by PallasAthene04Stamp 'I See The Light' (Tangled) by PallasAthene04Legend of Korra Stamp by moonprincessluna
Nintendo -Stamp- by DrXtremeYou gotta problem buddy? Huh?? by dragonflame95Totoro Stamp by sparkycom
Rainbow Brite Stamp by ShipwreckedStampsLEGO Fan stamp rev_3 by kiowapilotDreamWorks Animation stamp by Yamashita-chan
Pixar - stamp by hiena004wreck-it ralph stamp by Pharaoh-InkDisney Stamp by poserfan
Zuko - Stamp by xblackrose137xEd stamp. by obakestampsHomunculus stamp by Utao
Simon's cat - fan stamp by scribblinRvB Caboose Fan Stamp by IrockoutloudestFrozen: Elsa and Anna Stamp by DIA-TLOA
TV weaknesses of mine
Firefly by somethingunuasulKaylee Stamp by Wesker-ChickStamp :: Rivers Crazy by uizu
Humanity is Overrated by Mr-Stamp Stamp Battlestar Galactica by DwayneFTrue blood stamp VI by Flurish

Castle



Yeah... I'm a castle fan
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Castle Stamp by DAS-StampSo romantic by LS-Chan-NadHandsome by LS-Chan-Nad

Prints

Many of these prints I made available just so I myself could buy them.
:giggle:

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Zilenna's Profile Picture
Zilenna
Liz Anne
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Above picture is me peeling the liquid latex handprint off my face at the end of a costume party in which I was "Echo" from the Marvel Universe.

So about me... I'm a Scorpio. I don't believe in the zodiac but it's interesting... and mostly wrong about me. ;) I have and will poke things with sticks both dead and alive... the human body facinates me in how it moves, heals, adapts, reacts and feels...

My writings are all very personal. You will find very few pieces that could be called fluff or shallow. If you intend to explore my gallery, really read it, because by the end, for better or worse, you'll know me.

I respond to new faves with llamas...

I've been told I have a savior/big sister complex so if I adopt you, don't be surprised. If you can tell I've adopted you and you'd rather I didn't, let me know. I tend to start thinking of my DA family as actual family, but if I'm crossing boundaries please, I need to know so I can stop. :tighthug:
Interests

Two Track Life / Dear Tzaigan

Journal Entry: Sat Mar 1, 2014, 11:50 AM

My life is going forward on two tracks...

The one in which I am free, full of untapped potential and excitement and new experiences places and people greet me all along the way. And it is great. I'm not complaining. True, it's daunting and nerve wracking and there is a fear associated with the unknown since I've never been good at confrontation or self-motivation or making big decisions.


The other track running in the background is one of infinite sadness.

My lover, husband, best friend hasn't been my lover in a long, long time. Very recently it became official that he is no longer my husband and admitting that aloud or even to myself is still a punch to the gut that leaves me breathless and fighting tears. I do not want this trend to continue and lose him as my best friend next. He still knows me better than anyone else and I still love him fiercely and would defend his honor against any opponent and defend his life even if it meant my own. I can't decide if that makes me pathetic or not. Granted, if anyone but me calls me pathetic I'd take offence.

Dear Best Friend/ex husband/ex lover,

I recognized signs a long time ago but my cry for help was silent and tucked away where it didn't help anything.

Melancholy Apathetic Psuedo-rantI sit at my laptop, legs crossed on the carpet,
My back faces your left shoulder, 4 feet away as you slouch on the futon, facing your laptop.
You're away in online college, furthering your future, expanding your mind.
Me? I match brightly colored candies on the internet,
Chuckle at humorously captioned photographs of people places and things that have nothing to do with me.
Roll my eyes at the comments, complaints and the idiocy of strangers, friends and people I knew once and superficially keep in touch with through one liners and thumbs up clicks.
Your occasional attempts at conversation start with something you've just learned and find amusing, or frustrating, and usually end with "never mind, would take to long to explain it."
I miss you.
My attempts at conversation or together time get shoo'd off for schoolwork.
Or I get reminded of what I could and should be doing with my time.
What you're doing is important so I try not to be bitter.
On brain overload you vedge out to a game sys

Intellectualizing only touches the surface and I don't really care how smart you and I are... we've surely proven we are capable of stupidity more than once.

PleaI'd like to not be considered fragile
But I can't pretend the tears aren't just below the surface...
As are the wounds invisibly inflicted and quietly carried.
Straight spine, vibrant smile...
Just don't ask the wrong questions.
Or make certain types of statements.
Or see through the façade and look at me with sad eyes.
I'll crumble.
We've already filed...Don't do that to me!
We're supposed to be ok with this. We've talked about this over and over and over. It's fair and it's rational.
But the heart is neither fair nor rational.
That's why this whole thing is so hard.
    I don't want to leave you.
So you starting little "what if" trains of thought...
    ...They run me over...
Your sad eyes bring tears to mine.
    The divorce was your idea!
You asked for it. After the initial shockwave of anger and tears, I started looking at the idea rationally.
You are unable to fill a role for me that we've both acknowledged I need.
    Why is it so hard for you to be?
And the idea of finding someone new that I may love just as passionately but can be all I need...
    It's a scary, attractive, daunting, depressing idea.
Why shoul


And I can spit metaphors all day long to make something sound poetic instead of like a rant about the bitch that caused so many problems on her own... in the end I hate her. And I hate how your misguided nobility made you protect her even after she stopped being able to demonstrate she was worthy even if she couldn't reciprocate. Of all the mistakes in my life I think I finally have something to regret. And that was trusting her with my heart which led into you giving her yours as well.

BlueI'm willing to believe it was a knee jerk reaction
But its also something that can't be taken back
   Not really, anyway...
   Not that I'm predicting youll try though
      Just saying.
I had been drowning in my own exhalations
Mad at the world for claiming it had a blue sky
Because I couldn't tell anymore
   Seeking connections
   But hardly making any effort
Ensuring my loneliness was chosen
Rather than deserved.
Then I reached a point
Where my opinions started mattering to me again
And it hurt that they didn't seem to matter to you anymore
   The sky is blue, right?
You're not disagreeing
But neither are you offering any thoughts of your own
Agreement or otherwise
   So I ask again
      And it annoys you.
Leaving was a foregone conclusion
But the timetable was flexible once
   And I love you enough that any time I spent with you
   Was worth lingering over
But my abil

At the end of every day, I'm still me... even with my two track life.

I want you on the exciting track with me because every new experience I have, I want to tell you about it, share it with you. Because I know you'd appreciate it, be proud of me, happy for me, be able to amplify it for me and share in it yourself.

Crying BlindI'm looking at the screen with half-submerged porthole eyes.
I haven't cried over you in a while...
Not that you haven't been a constant presense in my mind or anything, but I do what I can to stay distracted and practice erecting walls and fashioning masks.
Like the mask I wore when we last saw each other. It held up for the most part but found itself water soluable to your tears...
That was new.
Seeing you cry like that...
Not going to lie, there was some satisfaction in knowing you actually felt something even with all your rationalizing and intellectualizing through what led us to this place.
But actually seeing you cry hurt me like no other hurt I have ever known before.
Believing that all this nonsense was preventable... and I really think that it was...
We didn't need to ever hurt this way
Did we??
Hindsight is always 20/20 or whatever the stupid saying is... looking back you can analyze all the little pieces of the puzzle that currently are all messed up on the carpet. Stepped

Packing ColorIt was surreal
Watching my hands as though they were someone else's
Strip the colors from our life together
And put them away into moving boxes
All with my name on them.
Was I really the only reason for color in your life?

I love you

Always

Forever

Yours

Catharsis 1 by ZilennaCatharsis 2 by Zilenna

Catharsis 3 by ZilennaCatharsis 4 by Zilenna




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:iconmrhungry56:
Thanks for the Llama. I promise to take good care of it.
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:iconmotherearth01:
motherearth01 12 hours ago  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you very much for faving my work.
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:iconcskadoz:
cskadoz 2 days ago   General Artist
:icontardglompplz: . . . :tighthug: . . .:hump: . . . Opps, t'anks for cake, Liz. :kiss:
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:iconzilenna:
Zilenna 1 day ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Well happy birthday! Airborne 
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:iconjwa2277:
JWA2277 2 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Added you to my watch list I hope I haven missed anything! ....and as always I have some questions.
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